Birthdays and Disneyland

So today I got my confirmation on Kiers birthday party. YAY!! Everything was finalized with the party planner this morning. So the 28-30 of Jan we will be in Anaheim at the Disneyland resort.

Its a tradition for Kier to celebrate her birthday there. It started when she was three and has continued. We did not get to go last year so this year so be exciting. I'm hoping that I will be able to hang in there for those few days seeing that I'm pregnant. I myself will not get to ride the rides that i normally love. I'm sure i will find other ways to have fun.

I am however a bit disappointed that my plans will not fully follow through. Karl had told me last night that Melissa had said to him that she was taking the girls to Disneyland as well. It came as a bit of a shock because we were planning on taking all five kids with us. I even had a conversation with Melody back in October about my plans. In a way I feel like this was done to ruin our plans. I hope it wasn't......

After a careful discussion, Karl and I decided that it will just be us with my 2 daughters going. We came to the conclusion that it would be pointless for his girls to go to Disneyland twice in the same month. It would no longer be as fun or interesting to them. Not to mention we would not see the excitement in there eyes nor would it be that special anymore. It seems that whenever we try and go somewhere with all the kids it never falls through.

Sea World was a bust also. We had planned to take all the kids as a surprise but Melody decided to go home the night before. She did not want to accept being punished for lying and physically attacking her sister. She called her Mom to pick her up and then Kayla out of the blue decided to go home to. Karl and I decided we should still go with the other kids and that it would serve them right not going due to their behaviors. Low and behold that morning he decided not to go. He said he just wouldn't feel right. I think he was still hurt and felt betrayed.

Anyways I'm looking forward to this trip. I think we will be allowing Kier to bring a friend. I'm sure she would like that. It will be nice to get away for a few days.

Christmas Day

So today went fairly well. I managed to keep the house under control and keep my sanity. It appeared that all the girls liked thier gifts with only a few complaints. It was unexpected to find that Amber had been dropped off to us sick. Normally I would not mind but since the pregnancy i was a bit upset. I have been struggling for the past few weeks being sick on and off. Seeing that I can't take anything makes it worse. I'm hoping that I won't get sick again.

Dinner at Karls parents house went well as expected and I almost made it threw without barfing. I have been doing well with the morning sickness but it still comes out of the blue at times. Its nice knowing that his family likes me and that they are excited about the pregnancy. It makes it so much more easier when the barfing takes place.

So the fatigue has really got me that i think i shall end this early and pick up some more tomorrow.

Merry Christmas!!!

Versions of Fairness

"Its not fair"

That's a phrase i have been hearing way to much as of late. To the point that i want to scream. Its down to kid verses kid with Karl and I in the middle. Everything from chores, computer time, bedtime, food, clothes, games, allowance, you name it. I find myself wondering how to move foreward without feeling guilty for what my girls have.

I have learned early on that if i ever wanted anything in life, i have to work hard for it. I don't expect money from the state nor do i expect money for free. I go out and i work my but off. I provide for myself and my girls. I always make sure that my girls are well taken care of before myself. They always have appropriate shoes, clothing and items essential for living. If ever i cannot afford it, i will take on another job or more hours.I always like having extra money so that i can do and buy extra things that we want rather then need. I cannot stress how hard i work for everything that i have.

My stepdaughters have been approaching my husband and I pointing out the unfairness of what my daughters have verses them. Its almost a grey area to me. For my view on this is that my household and thier household are much different. Incomes for instance play a big part in this. I don't think it is right that we must feel guilty for the lack of essential and luxury items my stepdaughters do not have. I know this might anger some but let me explain.

During my husbands divorce he was ordered to pay child support. Which he pays and has never been late on. He was also ordered to take on 90% of the marraige debt, which he is still paying. He pays for thier medical insurance and 50% of medical bills.See his ex did not work then and does not work now. Since my marriage i now am sharing the payments on his debt. She has remarried and has chosen to have more children. From what i understand her husband takes on the role of provider. Now don't get me wrong, i'm not downing her. Its her choice to be a housewife as its my choice to be a working mom.

With all that we still do more for his girls. We have gone out and bought clothing and shoes for them that we keep at the house. They have personal hygein items here. He pays for their wow and club penguin accounts. We try and take them places to eat and have fun when they are down. Mind u we have them 1-2 days a week and they live with thier most the rest of the time Somehow its not enough for them.

Its unfair that my girls get new clothes and they don't. My girls get an allowance for chores completed. We go out to eat without them. We go bowling, skating or to an amusement park without them. My kids got a new game or toy. The list goes on. I'm just wondering where does it stop?

I'm left feeling that it should not fully be expected of us to do all this extra providing. We have bills too. I have kids that live with me 85% of the time. But apparently i'm the bad one because i'm not including them in or providing for the 75% time that they are not with us.

Lets See

So i'm gonna give this whole blogging thing a shot. I find that i get frustrated a lot now that my family has grown. Overnite i went from having just me and my 2 daughters to having my new husband living w/us and his 3 daughters coming over a nite or 2 a week.


I have often thought it would be a smooth transition but it has proven me wrong. When I talk to my husband about the issues this new life brings, he is understanding and tries to help with suggestions but all to often i find that it really is no help. When the issues come down to the kids, you really need all parents involved. I want everyone to sit down and talk it all out but no one else does.

Unfortunatly, my husband and his ex do not know how to communicate with each other. I have attempted to get them to talk but she has refused and at that point he thinks its not worth it. I know people have there reasons but at some point they need to be put aside for the sake of the kids. I have seen and heard my husband get walked over on issues that he needs to put his foot down on. I have pointed it out to him only to have him respond that he can't make her mad for if he does she will not allow him to see the kids. I have come to realize that he may be right. Its sad because i know how much he loves his kids.

So how do these issues get dealt with?

I know i'm not a perfect parent and i realize that the way i raise my children is not everyones way. With that said i think that some things are fairly straight across the board. So rather then start listing all the issues I will begin a seperate post for each one........